Mom with migraine: child’s perspective

Introduction

As part of my “Migraine. As told from the other side” series, I recently talked to my 10-year-old daughter about what it is like to have a mom with migraine for a parent. She is quite an artist in our family and drew this image to show how she envisions migraine! 

While the chat was short, I loved her openness and her honesty. I do think it is worth it to talk to your kids about migraine! Being more educated about migraine helps them not to worry and grow up with a sense of stability, no matter what challenges migraine throws at the family.

Here it is.

Mom: What did you think migraine was a few years ago?

Alexandra:

I thought that migraine was an incurable headache. Now I actually understand what it is.

Mom: What do you know about migraine now?

Alexandra:

Migraine is a dysfunction in your brain cells. Your symptoms are usually bad headaches, feeling nauseous, and sensitivity to things. Migraine sucks!

Mom: You have a mom with migraine. What is it like for you when I have a migraine?

Alexandra:

It is usually early in the morning so before I wake up. I wonder why you have a migraine. You are more tired and want to lie down. Sensitive to light and noise and smells.  Your mood is sad. But you are just as good as a parent.

So, we watch TV and cooking shows and do art and crafts instead of active games.

Mom: What is it like on the day when I don’t have a migraine?

Alexandra:

You are more active. You want to do things. We go outside and play in the backyard. You are also in a good mood.

Mom: Is there anything about me having migraine that makes you worried?

Alexandra:

No.  Because I know that migraine for you is a problem but you know how to manage it. So, it is not dramatic or scary for me.

Mom: How am I different from other parents because of migraine?

Alexandra:

The difference between you and other parents is that you are more patient and reliable, you promise to do something and you get it done, you are always on time, and you are also more caring.

Mom: As a child, what do you want to change about migraine?

Alexandra:

I would like there to be a cure for it.

Mom: How do you usually try to help when I have a bad migraine?

Alexandra:

I curl up next to you to comfort you. 

Mom: Yes, I so love that when you comfort me. Thank you, honey! I love you.

P.S. from mom with migraine  

As a mom, I worried about how my migraines would impact my child and her view of me. Her saying that I am a good parent – migraine or not – was very heartwarming to hear. I also see that because we communicate a lot about things in general, she is confident and calm about my condition. Which is exactly where I would want her to be.

As an advocate for American Migraine Foundation, I started my advocacy at home by having some short and sweet 5-minute chats with my family members about what migraine really is and how they can help me cope with it. Also chats about how we can still have fun as a family and enjoy our life together. I am so glad I did! Take the time to educate your family about migraine! It will have a long-lasting positive impact!